What kind of a rescue team runs out of gas on its mission to save a missing person? Not a good one.

I was a model employee. Until.

The phone begins to ring as I flip the switch to turn on the kitchen lights. And this is the exact moment when my good fortune turns bad.

I am relieved to discover that real toilets are provided and I won’t be expected to pee in a hole in the wall.

I cautiously opened the door to the kitchen. I say cautiously because I had a bad feeling about what was inside.

For years I considered the one-day cruise I took with Pat to be my most embarrassing experience.

My earliest memory of being frightened by a bug was when I was about five years old.

In the end, I was never in peril – not from any murdering realty agents or from the psychopathic Murray Perch. I lived to tell the tale.

Have you ever pretended like you were asleep so you could listen in on someone else’s conversation? Admit it. I have.